January 25, 2014

Be a Rock

It started with a phone call.
This was the call that I feared.
I'm on my way...no wait.
Let's see what they say.
Time passed so slowly that day.

There was another call, another one I didn't want to hear.
They say that all bad words have four letters, they were wrong.
Later the night came a familiar right tone.
One I wanted needed to hear more than anything.
Don't worry about me.
I'm good...be strong.
Be a rock.

Another day, a flurry of calls.
When can I leave, not yet.
Then the ring tone I have come to love...
Don't worry about me.
I'm good....be strong.
They need you.
Be a rock.

The time I made the phone call...
I love you!
Be strong.

I see the tears,
I see the love.
I see the fear.
I see the world falling apart.

Then I see with my own eyes.
My original little man.
I see him running around.
I see him in the backseat with all his friends.
I see him out on the field.

Memories fill my head of the years in the past.
Football games,
Basketball games,
movie marathons,
kayaking with my daughter.
My two worlds colliding....
My world crumbling.

Family and friends start to come by.
We shared memories,
We shared tears.
We laughed until we cried.

How can I stay strong?
I feel like my life is crumbling around me.
I can't do this I say.
Yes you can says MY rock.
He needs you. I'm here for you.

I didn't couldn't finish this poem...I didn't want to think beyond that time. I didn't want to feel the separation, I didn't want to think about the pain anymore, the helplessness that I felt. That all changed on Thanksgiving....

Today I heard the most magical sound in the world....
For the first time in 40 something days,
I heard his voice..
It made my day..
What did he say?
What's Up??

****update****

He is kicking some tail!  He is an inspiration. He is now MY rock. To say that I am proud of how far he has come would be an understatement.











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